What requires a specific annual moon sighting to begin, lasts 30 days straight, and feeds the entire nation? That's right, the Aamir Liaquat show. At this point, it doesn't even matter what his current show is called — he's done some half a dozen with different names over the years — so let's just dub them all the Aamir Liaquat show (let's be honest, he is what's on show).
We can debate what he's feeding the nation later, but he's certainly whetting an appetite.
Before we move ahead, it is integral that you, our beloved reader, understand why he's under fire this time.
It's because he tried to go full Madhuri. Never go full Madhuri. You can skip to second 18 to watch what has horrified people so deeply.
You may skip to second 56 and watch beyond.
Ladies and gentlemen, we present to you, a currently seated member of the National Assembly, and an ex-minister for religious affairs.
Looks like a classic case of the aamil offline.
This isn't even his first fall on screen. He's taken quite a few spills in his illustrious career.
Pakistanis on social media and otherwise have been sharing these videos, rejoicing at his antics but they're not all laughing with him.
'Why would one do this?' ask Pakistanis playing the video over and over again, sharing it and allowing it to reach more people. They laugh at him and scratch their heads in confusion, as they begin following his show for these ridiculous moments. Liaquat pulls one moment after another, to an audience still confused why one would do that — though busting their guts laughing — yet still rocketing his ratings. Later that night, the audience is still asking the same question while Liaquat counts his dough in bed. His phone rings and he gets a contract for next year.
Here's how Pakistanis are reacting to our national enigma.
The multi-disciplinary artist and social worker Jamal Shah called it an intolerable ridiculing of the arts. "He's been greatly successful playing the fake scholar and the unauthentic politician, though him dancing to the Indian film Nagin's music shows his mind and body doing something completely different," he said. Shah said a character like Aamir Liaqat suits the premier well.
Fine, fine, our imagined annoying reader, we'll give you some memes.
The best of the episode came when Liaquat decided to publish a tweet, asking fans if they have questions for the "ulema". Oblivious, it seemed, to his antics of the past day. Or perhaps just excited to see what happened next.
We wouldn't be so excited if we were him.
Kya? Iblees reha hogaya?
Feeling guilty for all the times we raced while not fasting.
He has but a simple request.
Honestly, Aamir bhai, what in the world were you thinking? But then again, the nation is once again well fed.