How to plan the perfect first date according to Atif Aslam

Updated 07 Jan, 2017 05:30pm

Images Staff

Watch and learn, peeps.

Yes boys, take note (please don't).
Yes boys, take note (please don't).

Atif Aslam released his single 'Pehli Dafa' yesterday and we've picked up on a few dating tips from the singer.

The song is full of lovey dovey anecdotes and descriptions of exactly how you feel when you are with your one and only. How 'Ik woh nazar, ik woh nigaah, Rooh mein shaamil iss tarah' and all that jazz. So original, so Atif.

How is this song different from the many love songs Atif has sang with videos of him in eye-catching backdrops and a pretty girl just existing?

Because it's not about when you first see that beautiful being who makes your heart go loopy. Oh no, this is beyond the beginning. This is the first date. Yes boys, take note (please don't).

That time after you have mustered all your strength to ask your crush out and he/she said yes! Now what? You need to impress! Worry not, child, Atif Aslam here shows us exactly what is needed to impress.

So just relax and check out Atif Aslam's ten tips on how to ace your first date. Watch and learn, boys. Watch and learn:

1) Fly your date off to an exotic location

2) Dinner? Movie? Pfft, you take 'em to the ruins

3) Dress like you've stepped right out of the matrix

4) And then keep switching clothes, cuz you know, gotta give 'em the best of both worlds

5) Channel your inner Shah Rukh Khan

6) Don't give her attention when she asks for it. Pretend she doesn't exist

7) Surprise your date. Sneak up on her and linger...

8) Find yourself a Brazilian, because Mahira Khan ain't good enough

9) Most importantly, maintain safe distance, because... desi aunties

10) And windmills... just because. Apparently Brazilian women dig it

Disclaimer: this article is categorised as humour/satire. Its content is not meant to be read literally, and the views expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of the writer or the views of the IMAGES editorial staff.