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Drama Mere Ban Jao highlights the haunting impact of revenge porn

The show closely mirrors a scary reality — as described by three women who have had their intimate pictures leaked online.
01 Dec, 2023

Mere Ban Jao, a drama based on multiple real-life cases, looks at how revenge porn affects women. The protagonist, Azmia (played by Kinza Hashmi), is engaged to her cousin Fardeen (played by Azfar Rehman). Fardeen loves Azmia but, as we come to see, has severe anger issues and abusive, narcissistic tendencies.

Before the wedding, Fardeen emotionally blackmails Azmia into performing sexual acts on a video call, which he secretly records. Initially, Azmia is terrified and reluctant but Fardeen repeatedly reassures her that it’s not a big deal since they are pretty much already husband and wife and, anyway, she should be willing to do this one ‘small thing’ for his happiness.

Later, Azmia and Fardeen’s relationship ends over allegations that Azmia is involved with her tailor, played by Zahid Ahmed. It is a drama, after all. By this point, Azmia can clearly see Fardeen for the deeply problematic, toxic person that he is and refuses to give him any more chances. In an act of revenge, Fardeen posts Azmia’s videos (with his face blurred) online for the world to see.

According to Hashmi, who plays Azmia, the way private pictures and videos are used for blackmail and exploitation is a relevant topic in today’s digital age. The actor, who spoke to Images earlier this summer, said she prepared for Azmia’s character by reading about revenge porn cases online. She said she personally knows women who have trusted the wrong person and fallen victim to revenge porn and that it’s becoming increasingly important to be cautious about trusting others with sensitive information.

“Dramas showcase the realities of our society and act as a mirror that reflects the social implications and challenges faced by individuals. It’s crucial to bring forth unconventional and thought-provoking scripts that go beyond the traditional saas-bahu dramas and love stories and address pressing social issues that affect our communities,” Hashmi told Images.

Even though she was eager to highlight the issue of revenge porn, she was nervous about filming the scenes in which Fardeen is forcing Azmia to do intimate acts over video.

“I was hesitant to do the scene but then I sat with my director [Ahmad Kamran] and planned how to subtly convey the message without it being uncomfortable. It’s understandable to feel apprehensive…as there [are] concerns about potential backlash or controversy. However, we couldn’t carry on with the story without showing this scene,” explained Hashmi.

Smartphones and social media have made it easier than ever to share photos and videos online. This has made revenge porn more common than ever. While anyone can be a victim of having their photos and videos leaked without their consent, the most common victims are women and girls between the ages of 16 and 26.

Earlier this year a BBC Panorama investigative report uncovered a subreddit where users traded non-consensual pictures of South Asian women. Before it was shut down, the unnamed subreddit had over 20,000 members and more than 15,000 images. Some images even contained the woman’s personal details.

Three women, who reached out to Images anonymously, described the devastating impact of having their intimate pictures leaked by vindictive exes. All three experienced debilitating depression and anxiety and, even years later, walk around feeling as if everyone is looking at them or talking about them.

Once a photo or video is posted online, it can be challenging to completely remove it from the internet, which means that many women feel haunted for years and years by the threat of an old intimate photo or video resurfacing.

One woman who spoke to Images described how a leaked nude video of hers ultimately cost her her job. Another, who was only 14 when nude images of her were posted to a website by an older man who had pressured her into taking them, said she still compulsively searches the internet to see if her pictures pop up on any websites. Yet another woman told Images that although five years have passed since her semi-nude selfies were leaked by a bitter ex, the first thought she has when she meets someone new is whether they have seen her semi-clothed.

For the longest time, there were no consequences for the person committing the criminal act of posting revenge porn. But, in 2016, Pakistan adopted a set of policies that criminalises distributing video or photos “in a manner that harms a person” without their consent. The crime is punishable by up to five years in prison and a Rs5 million fine.

But changes to laws don’t always equal changes in mindsets. Even though the person who shares someone’s intimate photo or video without their consent is committing a crime, it’s still victims who continue to disproportionately receive the blame.

As Mere Ban Jao depicts, victims who have their intimate photos and videos circulated on social media channels, pornography sites or even WhatsApp groups, have to live with not only the public humiliation but can also experience threats to their personal safety and mental health.

According to Hashmi, protecting yourself online is important and something we should all be vigilant about but, ultimately, the person who shares your personal content without consent is the one to blame, not you.

“Azmia was naive to fall prey to Fardeen’s trap…but later she [takes] a stand for herself. I guess that’s the real crux of the story…”