‘Toxic masculinity is nauseating’: Nadia Jamil says the bar for men in Kaisi Teri Khudgarzi is set too low

Kaisi Teri Khudgarzi just aired its last episode a day ago and it has naturally left the viewers in an informal panel of their own, discussing the trajectory of the drama. Actor Nadia Jamil shared her thoughts on the show and called out the male leads for being cloaked with toxic masculinity. She said that our dramas are setting the bar too low for heroes.

Kaisi Teri Khudgarzi stars Danish Taimoor (Shamsher), Dure Fishan (Mehak), Nauman Ijaz (Dilawar) and Atiqa Odho (Shamsher’s mother). The drama is about the son of a business tycoon, Shamsher, falling in love with Mehak, who belongs to a middle class background. His family does not approve of their relationship and drama ensues.

On Friday, she retweeted a tweet by journalist Fifi Haroon describing the drama as ‘well developed’, saying it was very much possible for Mehak to fall for the first man she gets close to despite all his red flags. Jamil responded by bringing up all the messed up things the male lead has done to manipulate the woman he loves into staying with him.

In response, the journalist said that her point was not to romanticise the behaviour, just to say that it wasn’t “implausible” for a girl with such a background to develop feelings for a guy like that.

The Mujhay Jeenay Do actor said that though she is horrified, it is entirely plausible that she did. “Many many women forgive their abusers. Low worth. The ultimate fantasy being validation from abuser,” she wrote, adding that what was actually implausible was the personality change the guy went through “from extreme devil to extreme angel”.

Referring to real life cases of abusive men, she said that compared to other horrible crimes, Shamsher can be considered a hero, which sets such a low bar for men.

She affirmed that it was Stockholm syndrome on the woman’s part and said it was entertaining since there was some sense of justice around the end.

Calling toxic masculinity “nauseating”, the Behadd actor said that so many dramas propagate it, such as Habs starring Feroze Khan and Ushna Shah and Fraud starring Saba Qamar, Mikaal Zulfiqar and Ahsan Khan.

She criticised Shamsher’s “change”, terming it “a bit far fetched”. Bringing up his obsessive codependent love, she also called out Mehak’s father for the toxic elements in his personality. “CONSTANT crying about being a dad of daughters. That was the worst. Much as I love the actor playing the dad — and he’s acted well. But those dialogues against being a dad of two daughters, uff.”

Have you watched Kaisi Teri Khudgarzi?