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“If there is anyone who can defeat the US presidential candidate Donald Trump, it is our very own Altaf Hussain,” said Shehzad Ghias, the comedian and host while beginning the insult comedy session at The Second Floor on Sunday.

“Altaf Bhai would have countered one of Trump’s demands to create a wall around the Mexican border by demanding a Mexican sooba [province] instead,” he added poker faced while the packed room roared with laughter.

Four Pakistani comedians gathered at T2F on Sunday to roast “one of the biggest trolls that there is: Mr Donald Trump,” host Ghias informed the audience in the beginning. It was followed by showing the audience a few clippings taken from American news channels where the US presidential candidate answered media’s consistent questions about his racism and name-calling with more insults.

The four stand-up comedians — Syed Usama, Ali Gul Pir, Jaffer Shah and Akbar Choudhry — managed to make the audience laugh even as some of their jokes fell flat.

Setting the atmosphere for the two-hour session, Ghias began by introducing the comedians by adding that Trump did not know he was being shamed “by a bunch of nobodies”.

Going first, Syed Usama, who is part of Ali Gul Pir’s team of producers, said Trump has set such a high bar for “telling sh*t jokes that it should become a standard. A standard where if someone does something really nasty, we could say you trumped up”.

Singer and stand-up comedian Ali Gul Pir began his act by saying people did not understand Trump; he means well. “When he says he wants to marry his own daughter, it implies that he wants to keep the family’s wealth within the family. Similarly, his statements about building a wall around the Mexican border is an attempt to provide America with a housing scheme on both sides of the border,” he retorted. Just then a picture of Farzana Royal City Scheme appeared on the slide adding credence to Pir’s point. He said that Trump has so much hatred for Muslims that he never uses a “Muslim shower”.

The audience comprising young as well as old people lapped up the jokes despite feeling uncomfortable with the swearing in the beginning. Sensing it, host Ghias gave out a disclaimer, in jest of course, saying that people who were already offended could leave and that they would be refunded. “What we are doing here is quite ‘small’ compared to the fact that a US presidential candidate spoke about his genitals at a public rally,” he added.

Published in Dawn, May 30th, 2016