Dear Pakistani brides, here's a list of wedding-day trends you should avoid

Every year Bridal Couture Week brings together dozens of designers, stalwarts and newbies alike, to serve up a picture of what wedding season might look like in the months to come.

Bridal Couture Week is heavy on the theatrics and bling, but it's often slammed for a lack of finesse. While some presentations on the runway cohere well, others veer towards the outlandish and unwearable.

With so much gota and dabka coming down the runway, how will you know which looks to steer clear of?

We'll help you out. Here's a list of wedding-day trends we saw at BCW that you should avoid... unless you're auditioning for a period play or starring in an opera, in which case, go right ahead.

1) The unfortunate midi-lengha

Now, don't get us wrong — we love mid-length pencil skirts, which can look incredibly chic when styled right.

But we're kind of over the mid-length A-line skirt, a fashion faux-pas unless you're in your first flushes of youth. Ditto for these midi-lenghas by Rangja.

A voluminous lengha that terminates at the calf has the unfortunate effect of shortening even the tallest, lithest figure. Look at what it's doing to Sunita Marshall: nothing good, we can assure you. If you're looking to do something different with your lengha we suggest playing with embellishment rather than length. For us, this look is a no.

2) For the men: walk away from the cravat

While cravats did make a tentative comeback in international fashion recently, we maintain this is a very, very, tricky look to pull off.

A cravat (or ascot) is a length of cloth wrapped, tucked and tied around the neck and is said to be the neck tie's forerunner. We think it should stay in the past.

Here are two pictures that demonstrate why you should stay away from the cravat:

In this get up, Aijaz Aslam is a fine-looking 21st century man who happens to look like he's from Victorian England. We want to move away from our colonial past, not toward it, right? We no likey.

And then there's the look on Ahmed Godil. No comment.

3) The decorative belt

A couple of years ago, when designers like Elan and Faraz Manan started belting dupattas over their lenghas, everyone drew in a breath of appreciation. So innovative, so fresh! everyone gushed. Unfortunately the look has now been done to death and beyond, with belts being tied over everything from jeans to lawn joras.

We can only say: stop this madness! A belt itself does not a glamorous bridal make. To make matters worse, the belts we see on the ramp are getting wackier and wackier. We can handle a simple dori with tassles, but must an outfit's central motif also be reproduced on its belt? No.

4) For the man: cut-out sherwanis, don't do 'em

Sherwanis are graceful as they are — long, stately, respectable. Why ruin them by cutting away the fabric, we ask?

This is a clear case of a designer being scissor happy.

5) Leave the capes and cowls for the superheroes

We've never seen a cowl-neck top work well on a man and this look is no exception.

We've reserved a special mention for capes: while the odd cape here and there might look good on a tall woman, we're generally not fans of this trend. And when you combine capes with blinged out embellishment? Even worse. The only thing that could add to our misery is placing an embellished cape on a man... oh wait. That already happened.

6) Peplum bridals

Peplum had its moment and it was three years ago. It's time to move on. And yet, for some reason, some designers continue to cling so tightly to this trend that we're seeing it in bridal wear.

It's not just that peplum isn't trendy anymore, we take issue with it because it doesn't fit a bridal outfit's silhouette. The peplum does nothing to accentuate your physique and rather makes you look disproportionate. The top looks stout and the hips look boxy, isn't that the opposite of what you'd want?

7) Embroidered tops AND bottoms

Coordinated separates are a thing , yes, but not one that should be worn to your best friends dholki.

A printed top can make a statement but all-over embroidery suggests you had no choice but to tear up your mother's curtains for a last minute look.

We like optical illusions, but not every time you move.

8) For men: don't tuck your shalwar into your socks

Just... Don't? Please?

9) Inner wear as outer wear

Can we all just agree to save our lingerie for the honeymoon?

Corsets and bustiers don't pair well with lenghas. There is literally no galaxy in the Pakistani wedding universe that'll appreciate this look.