How yoga helped Meesha Shafi relieve her cluttered mind

For 2017, I set several New Year’s resolutions for myself which is highly uncharacteristic of me as I have failed miserably in the past and hence try to avoid making grand promises to myself — especially ones that usually require will power and discipline.

But two years ago, I began yoga and I often find myself sitting in a cross- legged, lotus position with my hands on my knees, palms facing upwards, trying to focus on being upright, silent and mindful of the present, both figuratively and physically while struggling with an avalanche of thoughts that clutter my head.  

My daily practice begins with about 15 to 20 minutes of varied forms of deep breathing and meditation. On a good day, I would be good doing this for about five seconds. No kidding. But almost right away, I would find myself battling with relentless clutter flying into my headspace. Imagine ninja stars, with cut-throat blades, razor sharp and honed, well-experienced at invading my mind with to-do lists, grudges, unspoken anger or anxiety about upcoming tasks.

Regrets spun around and flew at me with the speed of lightening, reminding me of creative juices that I forgot to bottle up for some eventual, higher purpose. Interesting to note that the following 30 to 40 minutes of splits, squats, spinal bends, inversions and near-impossible stretches were way less daunting. 

According to my teacher, I should try and reject my thoughts. In other words, dodge those ninja stars like Bruce Lee, until they gave up. And I did overpower them. Not by blocking or resisting their entry into my mind, because what you resist surely persists, but by letting them enter with the ease and pleasant sensation of a cool breeze passing through, uninvited may they be.

Who has time for this? I thought … and since we all know that time is money, I thought I’ll just save myself some of that good stuff at the tail end of the meditation and started showing up later for class. Winding down at the end of a yoga session with a savasana, or corpse pose as it is commonly known, seemed to me hardly useful for increasing my strength and fitness. It’s called ‘corpse pose’? come on! So I trimmed those 10 minutes off at the end as well. 

What was I left with? A physical workout? Yes, and all I had to do was complete the entire chopped-up routine. It was mildly rewarding and my progress was mediocre. To cut a long story short, no big changes were felt or seen. 

It wasn’t until my amazing teacher gave me a firm yet gentle nudge to start attempting the whole hour from beginning to end, that I started to really understand what meditation means. According to him, I should try and reject my thoughts. In other words, dodge those ninja stars like Bruce Lee, until they gave up. And I did overpower them. Not by blocking or resisting their entry into my mind, because what you resist surely persists, but by letting them enter with the ease and pleasant sensation of a cool breeze passing through, uninvited may they be. So the aim is to let them move in and move on. Sure they can penetrate my consciousness, but are not invited to stay.

Last year, I vowed to learn and find out more about how to get rid of the noise we carry with us everywhere at all times and most importantly how to silence it. This knowledge is more precious than any worldly treasure.

While meditating, your silence becomes your wisest teacher. In its nothingness is everything, because nothing else can coach you more about yourself — the mindful of your own presence, the steady rhythm of your breath and a heightened awareness with which your body is seated.

Last year, I vowed to learn and find out more about how to get rid of the noise we carry with us everywhere at all times and most importantly how to silence it. This knowledge is more precious than any worldly treasure. So far, I have learnt that most of it is absolutely related to everything except the present. Things that happened once upon a time and things that we fear or dread might end up happening. Both being pointless directions as these are truly beyond our control. 

I am learning that I was wrong. Time is not money till you use it to stay connected to yourself. And if we can understand that, meditation need not only be practised in its conventional way. Your headspace is a far more valuable and lucrative territory than however many acres in Bedian.

Here are 10 things I have decided to do:

1- Playing and listening to even more music. 

2- Dancing. 

3- Reading hard copies 

4- Enjoying what I am seeing, smelling, hearing and touching instead of taking pictures. 

5- Keeping a journal. 

6- Writing down my blessings first thing in the morning. 

7- Taking more baths than showers. 

8- Looking into the eyes of the person I’m talking to. 

9- Drawing/painting the things I want to see in real life. 

10- Thanking the future in advance, for meeting my great expectations. 

...and here are 10 things I have decided to LOSE:

1- Facebook 

2- Screens at mealtimes.

3- Gossip.

4- Charging my phone at my bedside.

5- Checking emails, messages or social media 1 hour before sleeping and after waking up. 

6- Answering calls while in someone’s company. 

7- Keeping my phone in my hand while in the company of friends. 

8- Negative talkers. Complainers. Naysayers. 

9- Caffiene/Sugar. Anything that is known to bring you crashing down. 

10- Looking for someone to blame or expecting another to make you happy.

Originally published in Dawn, March 12th, 2017