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Updated 12 Apr, 2019

The final season of Game of Thrones is almost here and that means GoT fans can't stop the debates.

From discussing who will win the throne to who won't survive, we've analysed every character with such scrutiny, they might as well be invited to our weddings. Not Walder Frey, though... thanks again, Arya.

Knowing the characters so well, we think we know what would go down if they indeed were members of our family. Let's have a look.

Sansa Stark — The perfect bahu

Aunties all over the world swooned every time she said, "I am loyal to my beloved Joffrey," especially when her betrothed is being such a jerk. You all know she deserves better, but admire her for never speaking ill of her monstrous husband and never divorcing him either.

She is the ultimate Hum TV heroine.

Jon Snow — The one you didn't think would amount to anything

He was the one you heard all the uncles and aunties talk about; how he's bad at studying, stresses out his parents and keeps to himself. You feel sorry for him, especially when you hear Phuppo say, "Dawat pe achi tarha nahi milta, how rude."

But then he makes it, is on top of his game and now the fam asks him to join their grown-up table. He still doesn't greet them properly and rarely shows up to events but now it's because "bohot busy hai, kitni achi baat hai."

Daenerys Targaryen — The cool cousin

She is the most popular one with lots of followers on Instagram and the coolest pets that she'll even let you play with. The best part? She's kinda nice! Sure, you're kinda intimidated by her but you're always glad when she shows up at the function because you'll have the coolest company.

Cersei Lannister — The phuppo who always notices your weight

You suck your gut in when you greet her but before even greeting you back she'll always make a comment about your weight. Her catchphrase is "Moti/dubli hogayi ho."

And it's not just weight, it's all your flaws, be it your uneven nails, your split-ends or your last fashion crisis. What's worse, even her compliments are passive-aggressive. Should she mention your weight-loss, it'll be followed with an epilogue of how fat you were. Thanks.

She's mean, kinda snarky and is always unimpressed with what you do, but for some reason you do want her approval and you hate yourself for that.

Tyrion Lannister — The taya who gives the most Eidi

He's the one with the successful business, a big heart and an even bigger wallet. Sure, he talks a lot and sometimes you zone out but you know he adores you.

He dotes on you the best way he knows; with materialistic possessions.

Arya Stark — The second cousin who came from abroad

This cousin had one trip abroad for a programme and now it has changed her for life. The biggest change is how every sentence has some subtle mention of what she learned when she was abroad.

Sometimes it's not so subtle. Every conversation you bring up, every experience you have, she will add to it with her knowledge that she got when... you guessed it... abroad, because it was just so enlightening.

The Hound — The scary khalu

You don't remember the last time he smiled, probably because he never did. There are rumours he's in the mafia. There are rumours that he bit a man.

He, with his very angry face, is at every function and you are scared to greet him at events and try to leave the vicinity as soon as possible.

Melisandre — The random rishta aunty

She probably has no proper connection with you but has just been a family friend for a long time. That gives her the right to know everything about you and also play matchmaker.

Her matches are clearly never the best but does that stop her? Nope.

Euron Greyjoy — The sexist phupha

His wife is 'the ol' ball and chain' and he doesn't understand why young women need to study for a Masters degree. He thinks boys will be boys and sees his 48-year-old self as said boy. Every opinion he has is problematic, even for his generation, and you cringe at every word he says.

You wish someone would speak up to him but everyone really likes the gifts he brings from his many suspicious trips abroad.

Olenna Tyrell —The nani you love visiting

She is way ahead of her time and has the best stories to tell. Back in the day she took part in rallies and rebelled against the system and was everything you want to be now. She claims to have punched a police officer and you want to believe that. There is no filter on her and you love watching her drop harsh truth bombs, especially on the sexist phuppa.

She also dotes on you with the best meetha and takes your side when your parents don't want you staying out of the house too late.

Lysa Arryn — The khala whose kids are better than yours

You can never win against her children, who may not even hit the bare minimum but are touted as prodigies. In reality, they're monsters, who she insists are angels and can do no wrong.

Doesn't matter whether you've won a Nobel Peace Prize, her son could do a bad rendition of 'Gangnam Style' and she'll make that a bigger deal.

Shireen Baratheon — your favourite niece

Your phone is full of adorable photos of her and videos since she was a toddler, even of her blinking for the the first time.

You may not even like children but this is the one you dote on and she also adores you, having a cute term of endearment just for you. In your brokest days you still don't mind grabbing a toy or a snack for her and no one can mess with her because you will go Liam Neeson from Taken on them.


This article is categorised as humour/satire. Its content is not meant to be read literally, and the views expressed here do not necessarily reflect the views of the writer or the views of the IMAGES editorial staff.

Comments

khurram javed Apr 12, 2019 04:23pm
Good one
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Ahsan Apr 12, 2019 05:04pm
This is amazing. Thank you for this article. GoT rocks everywhere
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Fahad Apr 12, 2019 05:12pm
Some of these are good analogies like Cersei, Daenerys , The Hound, Lysa. The others don't relate much, especially Euron and Shireen. And I doubt that many people have nanis like Olenna.
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Manvendra Apr 12, 2019 10:38pm
Is GOT allowed to be telecasted in Pak
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Harmain Apr 12, 2019 11:44pm
Great
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Harmain Apr 12, 2019 11:56pm
Great One
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Abbas Khan Apr 13, 2019 01:55am
Its ok to show people of color in such articles but then SE Asians are too much obsessed with white people.
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Ahsan Apr 13, 2019 02:01pm
@Manvendra Well people watched via torrent . There is HUGE fan following of GoT in Pakistan
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HXD Apr 13, 2019 06:14pm
Lmfao
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Seemab Khan Apr 13, 2019 10:21pm
Hahaha
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Rohit Apr 13, 2019 11:25pm
Y
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Murtaza Apr 14, 2019 01:45am
to be very honest, it is by far the funniest and relatable article from Dawn in many many years. Brings one to the hub of family drama and affection. i have never enjoyed an article more than this in recent years , Brought true joy and an ear to ear smile on my face. Thanks alot.
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Zee Apr 14, 2019 10:53am
too good of imagination. but why so much bias against the inlaws? :D
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PS Apr 14, 2019 12:44pm
Brilliantly written.
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