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Bachelor life is a shallow, superficial existence: Imran Khan

Bachelor life is a shallow, superficial existence: Imran Khan

Although he's been divorced twice the politician is still optimistic when it comes to love and marriage
11 Jul, 2016

Two divorces later, Pakistan Tehreek-e-Insaf Chairman Imran Khan is all the wiser about marriage — which he maintains is a decidedly good thing.

According to The Hindustan Times, Imran Khan would prefer a married life over the bachelor lifestyle. "I led a very envied bachelor’s life. Many people would have loved to have the kind of life I’ve led, but if you get marriage right, it is a very civilised way of life," says Khan.

"Every young Pakistani wanted to be me," Khan continues. "And yet, given the choice between someone to live happily with and the bachelor life, I would always choose married life. Because bachelor life is: all that glitters is not gold. It is very shallow and empty. It is a superficial existence. You cause a lot of pain. As a bachelor there were a lot of heartaches, and I regret that."

Imran Khan remained a bachelor throughout his cricketing days — S&G and Barratts/EMPICS Sport
Imran Khan remained a bachelor throughout his cricketing days — S&G and Barratts/EMPICS Sport

"My greatest happiness was watching my children grow up. From the time they were born [his sons are now 17 and 19] till a year or so before my divorce was the happiest time of my life," he adds.

So what went wrong?

If that's his view of marriage, what caused his split with his ex-wives, Jemima Khan (m. 1995-2004) and Reham Khan (m. 2015-2015)?

About his divorce from Jemima, he says, "My marriage would have worked too, but it was just not possible for her [Jemima] to live here in Pakistan. She was young and the cultural life in Pakistan was difficult. The combination of living in a different culture and that too with someone who had just started a career in politics wasn’t easy," reveals Khan.

Imran and Jemima Khan, early days
Imran and Jemima Khan, early days

He wistfully adds, "Maybe now I would have dealt with it differently because now my political party is established, but... our relationship reached a dead end. She couldn’t live here and I couldn’t leave Pakistan."

Khan, though, appears to have made his peace with their split and is grateful that he still has a civil relationship with her.

"My marriages failed, and that’s part of life. You try your best and accept it as the will of God. And I’m very lucky that [Jemima and I] have a great relationship. Even today — 11 years after my divorce — I go and stay with my mother-in-law. The boys come and see me there. She still hasn’t taken my pictures down," says Khan.

Read on: You can only talk politics with Imran, says Reham Khan

Imran and Reham Khan on their wedding on January 8, 2015
Imran and Reham Khan on their wedding on January 8, 2015

On his second marriage to Reham Khan, Khan didn't say much except that it did not get easier. "The second time was much more difficult."

With children in the picture, Khan had to keep them in mind before making any decisions. "I thought I would try again, but it just didn’t work out because when you have grown children and she has grown children, it’s very difficult. There’s your family, her family. It was too complicated."

But despite all the difficulties, Imran Khan is wiling to give marriage another try. "I am more of a staunch believer of marriage now [after two divorces] than I ever was."

But he's not making the leap anytime soon.

Insisting that there is "not even remotely" a match in the offing, he says optimistically, "Marrying at 60 is not like marrying at 30. The great thing about life is that it’s unpredictable; you never know what’s going to happen tomorrow."

Comments

Umar Khan Jul 11, 2016 03:22pm
Yet another simplistic fatwa by IK! Just when divorce rates are creeping up and relationships are getting complicated and life is getting harder, Mr. IK decides to impart some wisdom, albeit this time on the benefits of a married life! The irony!
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shabbir Jul 11, 2016 03:27pm
His bachelor's life was shallow, it does not mean everybody's bachelor's life is shallow.
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UFO Jul 11, 2016 03:27pm
He is not a bachelor. He is a PhD now.
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Zak Jul 11, 2016 03:38pm
The great khan, speaks from his heart. Our next PM.
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Zac Jul 11, 2016 03:51pm
an inspiration for Pakistanis
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Suresh Jul 11, 2016 03:59pm
You know little about what you are commenting on. You should restrict to what you have done in your life. You had never imagined about a ascetic's life and the purposes of it. You are talking of a life which gives a person enjoyment till he has energy in his body but at the cost of one's body. Do you know the ascetic enjoys better than a married person with more freedom.
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Kranti Jul 11, 2016 04:10pm
He is ready for another marriage...
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50 Shades of Khaki Jul 11, 2016 04:18pm
Correction: Your whole non-cricketing life has been shallow
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Anarchist Jul 11, 2016 04:25pm
@Umar Khan He did not issue any fatwa, just expressed his feelings & his views based on HIS experience. @SHABBIR When did he say, everybody's bachelor life is shallow. He was asked a question and he answered based on HIS views. Whats wrong with it? He is not imposing his views on anyone.
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Daud Jul 11, 2016 04:49pm
He has become a lone wolf again.
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Qaiser Jul 11, 2016 04:52pm
Female journalist, be cautious!!!!!!
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timetostopthis Jul 11, 2016 04:54pm
@Zac Only the bit that relates to cricket is good. In everything else, he has been a failure.
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SaeedS Jul 11, 2016 04:57pm
@UFO - true LOL
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Mangomits Jul 11, 2016 05:02pm
Ik at your age one must enter vaan-prashthashram...or leave all material things n concentrate on spiritually uplifting self..hwevr u seem to be still stuck in the same old game driven by personal ambition n false ego..leave these at the door step n u will find peace..
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Hassan Jul 11, 2016 05:11pm
He is only sharing his experience, whether you agree with his political views or not. This could happen to any one and I think he and his ex-spouses has so far handled their break-ups gracefully. Which is not a common thing.
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M Jamal Jul 11, 2016 05:16pm
Marriage is giving and taking but regretfully IK has a tendency of taking only and the result is evident.
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Bilal Jul 11, 2016 05:17pm
He should do what he feels the best for him. He knows his goals and should take steps to suit him. We cannot judge him in any way
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KARACHI WALA Jul 11, 2016 05:19pm
@50 Shades of Khaki You said it all.
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Rashid Sultan Jul 11, 2016 05:27pm
A good man IM.
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Syed Waqar Ali Jul 11, 2016 05:33pm
Is there any way IK and Jemima are reunited.
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Ali Jul 11, 2016 05:47pm
@shabbir Exactly! I concur my friend.
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T.M. Reddy Jul 11, 2016 05:48pm
He has a very short half-life of marriage. The way he marries is just as luminous and ludicrous too.
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Harmony-1© Jul 11, 2016 06:07pm
@Timetostopthis - What do you know!
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Agha Ata Jul 11, 2016 06:09pm
Khan, What would you like your future- wife to be? What qualities, or inclinations would you like in her? Have you made a list of the things that you think might be useful if you both agree on? No woman or a man can show all the sides of her/his personality during the first few years.
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Zack Khan Jul 11, 2016 06:23pm
@Suresh Ascetism is not a way of life to reach to higher level!
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BK Jul 11, 2016 06:24pm
@timetostopthis Everything else he has been a failure??? Even IK's worst enemy would disagree with you. Cricket, hospitals, university, politics (you can disagree with him on politics). He has been the leading from the front. What world are you living in?
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Farhan Khan Jul 11, 2016 07:07pm
@UFO That is too funny Thank you UFO
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Ahsan Gul Jul 11, 2016 07:09pm
IK you're getting wise. There are many 40 years and above females available in Pakistan. Look for compatibility as our Pakistan is not simple anymore. There are strings in each relationship. Unselfish love is only in books and imaginations. Good luck.
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zulu Jul 11, 2016 07:40pm
he is right
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UnshacklePak Jul 11, 2016 07:45pm
Tell that to Mother Teresa.
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ART KP Jul 11, 2016 08:08pm
“Single is not a status, it is a word that describes a person who is strong enough to live and enjoy life without depending on others.”
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Ahmer Jul 11, 2016 08:19pm
Dawn should have emojis to truly express our feelings. For example this article warrants a guffawing smiley
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Awan Jul 11, 2016 09:28pm
Imran Khan stated " Every young Pakistani wanted to be me". The sense of entitlement and Pride is reflected from every statement of the humble Imran Khan. I am young and i never intended to become Imran Khan.So i am not a Part of Pakistani youth or what?. My inspirations are Scientists and Researchers not a failed politician like Khan. Someone should bring Khan back to the ground. He is too full of himself.
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jawhar Jul 11, 2016 09:30pm
Everybody does not earn millions from wife
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Sara Jul 11, 2016 10:15pm
He should see a psychologist. IK seriously needs therapy.
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Reham Jul 11, 2016 10:27pm
"I had told myself I would not indulge in infidelity and I never did." He has made a big deal out of being faithful. Why is it so difficult for him to avoid infidelity? It is something that you take for granted in a committed relationship and a marriage.
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Farooq Jul 11, 2016 10:41pm
He knows it all
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Nauroz Khan Jul 11, 2016 10:42pm
Imran and Jemima should remarry. They both now qualify to do that.
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Mohammad Afsar Jul 11, 2016 10:54pm
Hope your next experience of married life happens to meet your best desires.
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Exlim Jul 11, 2016 11:18pm
There has to be a lot of give and take in marriage. If Imran didn't figure that out the first time, he has not learned anything the second time either. He need a wife similar to Mr. Modi's.
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IK is right Jul 12, 2016 12:49am
I think he is right to a great extent. Bachelor life is fulfilling only if you are bachelor for a cause - like you are trying to make something out of it or trying to make a dent in the world. Otherwise majority of bachelors I know are just busy showing how happening their life is on facebook. For most bachelors, If you are on facebook 24 hours a day, there is no way you are doing something meaningful anyway in your day. Marriage (only if it goes right) can be deep and fulfilling relationship but majority of marriages don't really go that way and that is just sad.
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Tanweer Hussain Jul 12, 2016 12:55am
Mr. Khan, Merry someone who loves you, instead of someone whom you love. Do not go after good looks, go for a woman with good family background. ( Have been there done that. ) Tanweer Hussain
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Javed Siddiqui Jul 12, 2016 01:02am
Imran Khan should try to work things out again with Jemima.
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Edgar Khairullah Jul 12, 2016 01:46am
Imran; that is beautiful; from the heart and so sincere. Now; by virtue of my being a "Dinosaur" many years on this terra firms; I can advice you
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Kalim ki Saira Durrani,TX Jul 12, 2016 03:00am
IK should remarry ! 60 is not old and he looks great!
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K.Shah Jul 12, 2016 04:07am
This wise man got it wrong twice.
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Javed Jul 12, 2016 06:27am
Looks like our dear Khan has found someone! I hope third time is the Charm.
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Sage Jul 12, 2016 07:26am
He is so full of himself, so superficial and selfish!
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Abdul Sheikh Jul 12, 2016 08:32am
Wrolds' oldest teenager.
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Syed Jul 12, 2016 09:03am
His biggest weakness is his failure to compromise. ..in politics as well as in relationships....that's why he is left surrounded by only yes men now.
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Faraz Jul 12, 2016 09:58am
He did everything he could possibly do in his youth. Why life didn't sound shallow and superficial when he was actually doing it all? Now at 63, when he is done and dusted, of-course he would preach fidelity as he knows a partner much younger than his age might not be.
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karachi wala Jul 12, 2016 10:43am
My God!!! Who is third? May GOD bless her.
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Adil Zareef Jul 12, 2016 11:04am
Oh dear... Oh dear!!!!!
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KnowTheTruth Jul 12, 2016 11:09am
@Mangomits Absolutely. Instead of taking sanyaas (vanaprasthashram) he is declaring that he is single and looking again. This is due to lack of spiritualism. After numerous affairs and failed marriages, one would expect some maturity in a person who is vying to be head of state.
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Zak Jul 12, 2016 12:10pm
@K.Shah because he is human and it's a personal matter , not for anyone else to comment.
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Zak Jul 12, 2016 12:15pm
@M Jamal do not judge others.
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Zak Jul 12, 2016 12:19pm
@KnowTheTruth his spirituality is from his great religion. IK once said on an TV interview, that " in life there are always two plans, one made meticulously by self and the other is made for you from above, and in the end only one wins, the one from above". His personal life is following its destiny and perhaps it is taking him to where he is destined to be.
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khuram Jul 12, 2016 02:09pm
and he married the third time, there you go..
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Nawaz Islam Jul 12, 2016 02:55pm
Every time he plans a dharna he likes to believe his sponsors will soon usher him into the PM house and he will then need a First Lady for his state visits abroad. Stop day dreaming, your sponsors will only use you and will never let you occupy that position! By the way, Modi travels alone and yet he is respected all over, so get over the complex that you have. Leaders are respected for the countries that they represent, and not for the charm and glamour of the First Lady!
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Adnan Jul 12, 2016 03:25pm
@Syed Waqar Ali Yes ! ..... ......In heavens
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Adnan Jul 12, 2016 03:29pm
@Awan Follow your dreams ... This man is just a failure and big disappointment
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Azam Khan Jul 13, 2016 03:48am
@Zak All public figures are subject to scrutiny. People are free to air their opinion.
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Just a thought. Jul 14, 2016 11:19am
Imran should go back to Jemima. That is, if she takes him back. They should get married again. She is a wonderful strong women, who still cares for him. In fact, Imran should move to England .Its time he should learn to cherish his family.
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anon Jul 16, 2016 11:32pm
@Nawaz Islam Great comment! Unexpected but a good point made!
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Ishmael Jul 18, 2016 11:42am
@shabbir Imam Ibn Taymiyah, Imam Nawawi and Dr. Hamidullah did not have shallow bachelor lives because they were engaged in a scholarly spiritual and intellectual mission to shape human history. But without a divine mission, you cannot resist unlawful sensual looks
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